The Evolution of Happiness: Improving Human Happiness (Part Three)

Increase closeness of extended kin

If being deprived of extended close kin leads to depression in modern environments, individuals can take steps to remain in closer proximity or to maintain greater emotional closeness to existing kin. Modern electronic communication, including email, telephone and video conferencing might be exploited to this end when physical proximity is not possible. With people living longer, opportunities to interact with grandparents and grandchildren expand, offering the possibility of strengthening the network of extended kin.

Develop Deep Friendships

According to Tooby and Cosmides, people may suffer a dearth of deep friendships in modern urban living. It is easy to be sometimes friend when times are good. It is where you are really in trouble that you find out who your true friends are. Everyone has experienced fair weather friends who are only there when times are good, but finding a true friend, someone that you know you can rely on when the going gets tough, is a real treasure. People take pains to express their appreciation, communicating that they will never forget the sacrifices made by those who helped them in their darkest hour.

The loneliness and sense of alienation that may feel in modern living, a lack of a feeling of deep social connections despite the presence of many seemingly warm and friendly interactions, may stem from the lack of critical assessment events that tell them who is deeply engaged in their welfare.

Several strategies may help to close this gap between modern and ancestral conditions to deepen social connectedness. First, people should promote reputations that highlight their unique or exceptional attributes. Second, they should be motivated to recognize personal attributes that others value but have difficulty getting from other people. This involves cultivating sensitivity to the values held by others. Third, they should acquire specialized skills that increase irreplaceability. If people develop expertise of proficiency in domains that most others lack, they become indispensable to those who value those competencies. Forth, they should preferentially seek out groups that most strongly value what they have to offer and what others in the group tend to lack, find groups in which their assets will be most highly cherished. Fifth, they should avoid social groups where their unique attributes are not valued. A sixth strategy involves imposition of critical tests designed to deepen the friendship and test the strength of the bond. Those who pass the tests and provide help during these critical times make the transition to true friends marked by deep engagement.

Selecting a mate who is similar – Reducing jealousy and infidelity

One strategy is to select a long term mate or marriage partner who is similar to you on dimensions such as values, interests, politics, personality, and overall “mate value”. A large body of empirical evidence supports the hypothesis that discrepancies between partners in these qualities lead to increased risk of infidelity, instability of the relationship, and a higher likelihood of eventual breakup. Selecting a mate who is similar, conversely, should lower the likelihood of infidelity, and hence the agony experienced as a result of jealousy. Because jealousy appears to be an evolved emotion designed to combat threats to relationships, anything that reduces its activation should reduce the subjective pain people experience.

Education about evolved psychological sex differences

Education about fact that men’s and women’s minds house somewhat different psychological mechanisms, and that the differences can be deactivated under certain conditions, may help to reduce the frequency of strategic interference.

Managing Competitive Mechanisms

Perhaps the most difficult challenge posed by our evolved psychological mechanisms is managing competition and hierarchy negotiation, given that selection has fashioned powerful mechanisms that drive rivalry and status striving. Status inequality produces a variety of negative consequences, such as the impairment of health. One potential method of reducing such inequalities is to promote cooperation.

Evolutionists have identified one of the key conditions that promote cooperation – shared fate. Shared fate occurs among genes within a body, for example – when the body dies, all the genes it houses die with it. Genes get selected, in part, for their ability to work cooperatively with other genes. A similar effect occurs with individuals living in some kinds of groups. When the fate of individuals within the group is shared – for example, when the success of a hunt depends on the coordination among all members of the hunting party, or when defense against attack is made successful by the cooperation of a group’s members – then cooperation is enhanced.

Axelrod, an evolutionary political scientist, suggested several ways in which this can be done. First, enlarge the shadow of the future. It could be accomplished by making interactions more frequent and making a commitment to the relationship which occurs, for example, with wedding vows. A second strategy is to teach reciprocity, which not only helps people by making others more cooperative, it also makes it more difficult for exploitative strategies to thrive. A third is to insist on no more than equity. Greed is the downfall of many. By promoting equity, tit-for-tat succeeds by eliciting cooperation from others. One more strategy is to cultivate a personal reputation as a reciprocator. Cultivating a reputation as a reciprocator will make others seek them out for mutual gain. The combined effects of these strategies will create a social norm of cooperation, where those who were formerly exploiters are forced to rehabilitate their bad reputations by becoming cooperators themselves. In this way, cooperation will be promoted throughout the group.

The Fulfillment of Desire

Just as humans have evolved adaptations that create subjective distress, they have evolved desires whose fulfillment brings deep joy. Studies of private wishes reveal an evolutionary menu: the desire for health, professional success, helping friends and relatives, achieving intimacy, feeling the confidence to succeed, satisfying the taste for high quality food, securing personal safety and having the resources to attain all these things. Success at satisfying these desires brings episodes of deep happiness, even if people might habituate to their constant occurrence. Having adequate resources to fulfill desires, making progress toward fulfilling them, achieving a state of flow in the process of achieving them, and succeeding in fulfilling them, and succeeding in fulfilling them in particular domains such as mating provide a few of the evolutionary keys to increasing human happiness.

From the article “The Evolution of Happiness” by David Buss (2000)

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