December Story

So the world didn’t end on Dec 21, 2012 as someone predicted, and the story below is a good reminder on what is important in the rules of living:

“There was a man who spent his whole life robbing banks. He was a criminal genius who could easily break through the most sophisticated security systems. When he died an angel greeted him and showed him around. the man thought, “Wow, this is a great place! there is food; there’s a spa. Nice sleeping accommodations. There is everything I could ever need.”

But eventually he became bored.  He sought out the angel and said, “Angel, can you help me out? I’d like to rob a bank.”

The angel said, “Sure. Which bank would you like to rob?”

“You see that bank over there? That’s the one I want to hit.”

“What time would you like to do so?”

“Three this afternoon.”

“How much money wold you like in the safe?”

“Two million.”

“Perfect, two million dollars will be there, waiting for you. Here are the plans of the bank layout. Just walk in and take it.”

The man said. “No, no, no, no. You don’t understand. I want to plan this. I want to bypass the alarms and security on my own.”

“You can’t do that.” The angel told him. “Now that you’ve died, things are a little different. You just tell us what you want and we provide it for you.”

“But I’m the greatest bank robber the world has ever known. There is no thrill in doing it this way. What kind of racket do you have going on here in heaven?”

The angel looked at him gravely and replied: “Who said this is heaven?”

When you are a bank robber or a philanthropist, satisfaction comes from overcoming a challenge and thereby earning the sense of accomplishment. When we don’t feel challenged or don’t feel any sense of having earned something, we slip toward chaos. But when we earn, overcome or change an aspect of ourselves for the better, we experience the heavenly energy of Light.

It is the possibility  of losing against an opponent that gives fulfillment to winning.”

From “The Power of Kabbalah”  by Y. Berg.

Kabbalah Love (Class Four)

Our last class took place in Brookline instead of Cambridge, and it was a video recording, as the instructor was away. He spoke to us from the screen:

How to connect to love? Major problem with love for many is: it doesn’t stay the same as in the beginning. After initial excitement, you do the same stuff, love is fading away, and things deteriorate.

“I think I love the person, but there is no spark?” Look at the job, there used to be a spark, but with time we lost excitement. But if we understand the essence of a relationship, it has to grow. We need to maintain and grow love. Think about your soul mate, a friend, a parent or someone close to you. Does it bother you that he/she doesn’t do something for you, that you don’t receive enough? We expect to receive from others. We start to take relationships for granted.

There is only one source of energy, joy, health, prosperity and pleasure. In the moment we think that something or someone belong to us, we take them for granted. We forget the original meaning of a relationship. It is not a tool to serve my needs, but to grow. Everything around us is a gift. When we take our health for granted, we disconnect from the source, from the light. Everything including our health, finances, etc. nourishes from the light. We use gifts and don’t get connected.

A person in the relationship becomes part of the furniture in the house. I don’t see how special he or she is, I forget. I am not there to invest the energy anymore. It is not existence. How do you remove this ownership? Consciousness is against our nature. Togetherness, bonding and unity are not natural. They require work.

The worst thing you can do to romance is to get married. “What am I doing with this person? I lost that magic power”. When you get married, you feel like you got there, achieved it. You don’t need to invest anymore. And you will lose it, there will be nothing there. There is never a vacation in a relationship. Relationship is a constant every day work. You need to see other person and communicate, it is not only about you. But people still ask: what have you done for me lately? It’s not comfort zone, but a tool to help each other grow. Push each other. And it is not supposed to be easy.

One of the biggest blockages in relationships: expectations. “Do dishes, make me dinner, give flowers”. Expectations and conditions destroy relationships. Only thing to expect is human dignity, respect and listening.

Communicate what you want but if it still doesn’t happen, let go. Or it will create a bigger space between two of you. Don’t judge the other person, do what you need to do. Help each other grow.

Love will work only when we give 100% to make it work. The right way is to confront, challenge and take responsibility in proactive way. “He is wrong, he needs to come to me”. Instead we need to make it happen. If the person is not a good partner, he will evaporate and the other person will come.

Another blockage is entitlement. “He needs to change his attitude”. The other person is a channel from another universe. I do and I care. When I’m going to change, he is going to change.

Be a giver without expectations and don’t constantly judge the other person. It is impossible to do without being conscious. We need a place to awake a power. Other people may be doing same old: “I want to do what I do, receive what I receive”. If you want love, do hard work inside, otherwise it will happen outside – divorce, issues, pain. You need spiritual home, support. It doesn’t stay the same because love constantly needs to be nourished.

What helps in love is higher cost or higher purpose. We have the power to make a difference. When we contribute to something that is bigger than me and you, we find higher purpose for our togetherness. The instructors’ parents came from different backgrounds, but together they brought the wisdom of Kabbalah to their students.

Love all with no calculation. Love is not to study but practice. Love yourself, make yourself better and connect to everything through love. It will impact love and positivity all around us and everywhere around the world.

Check out “The Power of Kabbalah” and “The Power to Change Everything” books.

Kabbalah Love (Class Three)

Love is work. Our responsibility is to create love in our relationship, to create it in everything we do. Love your neighbor like yourself. But how can you give it, if you don’t have it? If you don’t love yourself, fake it, extend to love thyself.

Accept yourself the way you are. Accept the package you come with. “I’m special but not perfect. I need to work on it. I have to be at peace with myself. Only then I’ll be able to love others”.

People ask: “Where can I get love, to cure my loneliness?” It comes from inside. Just love yourself and them first. Don’t wait for anything.

Everything is available for me to learn, to grow, to become better. I only need to ask a question and learn. There is not always a direct connection between what is happening around and self-improvement. Take notice of judgement. If it upsets us, there is a lesson for us (need to accept).

Do you want to have a soul mate? If yes, then you need to go deeper in your relationships.

The instructor told us a story about a man, who was ugly outside, but as soon as he started to speak to the woman he liked, she noticed how beautiful he was from inside and she agreed to marry him. Don’t judge things with your 5 senses only, go deeper. There is no relationship until we are there 100%.

A soul mate will not usually be your type, but a vessel to help you grow. We need to see what is right for us, not think what is right.

Why do we have trust issues?

We don’t’ trust because we look at the person as a source of energy.

No human being is a reliable source of energy. There has to be something bigger. You need:

  1. To learn how it all works, what is God
  2. Learn tools to grow

Relationships are not the source of energy. Don’t count on the energy to come from another person. Come as a giver, not a taker. You can’t rely on people to react. You need to find your strength, energy. Be the creator.

Can you genuinely generate love for someone?

The Instructor gave us an exercise to find someone in the room that we don’t think we can ever love and talk to them. I personally didn’t move but some people switched places and moved around the room. How crazy is that, to tell someone you can’t ever learn to love them?

At the end the instructor commented: “You broke embarrassment. You started talking, then you made connection. During that connection, you break barriers. Then there is light, judgment is curtains. Break your judgment”.

If there is someone you don’t like, there is potential for energy, for growth. The opposite happens if you are indifferent about someone. Relationship with your soul mate will have room for growth, if not, you can just be friends.

Then we were told to go and say something nice to three people in the room. Participants introduced themselves, exchanged compliments and engaged in small talk.

At the end the instructor corrected us saying that no one asked the most important question: “Can I do something for you?” It would mean that we really care about the person, but it is not our nature to do it yet. To learn something new, you need to directly learn it from the person, no matter what it is. Learn from the person; overcome the difficulties of the relationship.

Love is care. If you want a better connection, you need to give, to serve first. We all agreed that sometimes we can’t resist love. “She felt the love and she couldn’t not love him back”.

Love is the ultimate weapon. When we came to this life, we had everything, but were not able to be the creators of love. Now we know we can.

You can generate love for anyone on the planet.

Kabbalah Love (Class Two)

Last week was my second class. The instructor opened it with the following saying: “People believe in three rings – engagement, marriage and suffering. Instead what we are really doing is trying to be as close to the creator as possible.”

We all like falling in love, feeling oneness, but spark can be developed between 2 people. Battle means work. Kabbalists don’t believe in love from first sight, there could be some connection when you meet a person, but real love comes later, when you learn the other person more. You can create love.

Why were we created yearning for love? To make us feel complete?

All the qualities to be there for other people needed to work with light, all those qualities are already within us. They were created within us.

Because this work is so out of reach all qualities within us will start develop through relationships with other people.

The Universe is created for me and by me. All work with people is a tool to get closer to God, to understand the Creator only through relationships.

It is hard to love those who we resent, but it is about giving and sharing.

We don’t get appreciation so we don’t like them.

In our opinion “Show appreciation and then I’ll like you”, but it is the other way around in Kabbalistic view: You can’t give what you don’t have. You have to appreciate first. You need to love yourself. How do I know that I love myself? You appreciate yourself?

Less I’m reactive the more I love myself. Less possessions, less emptiness within, less I want to determine whether I’m treated well from outside (criticism from other people). Then you will be able to be out there for other person, and not afraid of any losses.

I want to be perfect, to have an ability to know my true power, soul, to know my own baggage (my bad traits).

We are too focused on ourselves, so that we can’t be there for anybody.

What do you judge people for?

The answers were of full range, the majority was about mothers, selves, co-workers, relatives, or other people who judge us. Judgment is a reflection of something that I don’t’ accept within myself. I don’t recognize it.

To become more perfected, more aware, how do we start? Imagine I’m in my own movie, I’m the creator. Learn and improve through experiences every day.

The whole world was created for me. Everything is happening between me and other person – to help me become more powerful. To become more perfect, more loving. Allow me to meet someone who is honest. It is a tool to help me grow and become stronger.

Kabbalah Love (Class One)

Several weeks ago when I was in LA, I went to the introduction lecture on Kabbalah. When I returned to Boston, they emailed me about an upcoming 4-week course that takes place in Cambridge. I decided to enroll to get more familiar with this school of thought. What I liked the most about it is that it is open to all no matter what race, religion or gender. I also like the concept of giving before you are able to receive, which totally resonates with me. So I signed up for the course in Cambridge called “To Love – an in-depth look at the Nature of Love Itself”.

The course description said: “Kabbalah does not just contain the secrets to love. Kabbalah IS love. Take a 360 degree turn in your understanding of Light, life and love – and uncover the true purpose of love. This is more than “how to find your soul-mate” class. It is a journey into the essence of what it means to have a soul, why relationships exist, and how to open your heart to greater love and a deeper connection to people and the Creator”.

10 days ago I attended the first session with about 30 people. I was told there are about 300 people who are on the Kabbalah mailing list in Boston area. The session began.

Love One Care. These words represent number 13. Which is a special number meaning going beyond your traditional “package” of qualities, like the ones associated with 12 horoscope star signs, to love is to go beyond your normal description. Then the instructor asked us to write down qualities of people whom we love. It became apparent that these people show some affection toward us and support us in a certain way. We normally love because we receive love from those people. I wrote down the following: similar caring spirit, humor, intelligent. We were told that we often confuse love and need, but first thing to do in love is to give (yes, unconditionally).

Love is an outcome, never a cause of something. We see reflection of ourselves in other people or we look for and see something we are missing in ourselves and want to have. There is nobody else there, because we are in a relationship with ourselves. Is this love unconditional or does it depends on something? How do you recognize true love? If you plant a seed of love and it was a need , lack or co-dependency, it vanishes… it was not true.

There is no love at first sight, because we don’t know the person yet. We all have lacks, issues, judgements, who doesn’t? Love is not about fear of losing. We need to work on ourselves first: to separate our needs from love for other person.

Relationship definition: Expression of the yearning of the soul to join forces in the battle to promote our spiritual understanding and help each other to pay the cosmic debt (tikkun).

Relationships are about growing and transforming, the feeling of yearning and connection with this person. It can help me grow but I don’t know why. It has to help me grow and transform. Am I better with them or without them? Love is made of 2 different forces : give and take. Opposites attract, but in differences there must be something that unites us both. We got our life for free with no effort. But later in life you have to work for things to pay your cosmic debt/baggage to transform it (from past life or childhood).

Relationship: They should challenge us, help us grow. We like the idea of love but do we want to work for it. Whatever you want to get you need to give first. How does it make me feel? Do we give love anytime? (to whoever is in front of us?) No, we are busy. Usually we only love when we have time and in good mood or to those whom we like or those who like us. It is rare that people just give us, without wanting to get anything from us. We need to give love as a tool, example, to like all babies, not just cute babies. We need to be there for the person in front of us, we need to exercise love every day. And see what happens. That is our homework.

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